|from Penn State to State Pen|
10. He’s molested fewer boys than most catholic priests.
9. He knows a good tight end when he sees one.
8. He’s tough and can take a licking.
7. He knows his team inside and out.
6. The cheerleaders are safe.
5. He gives players gifts and treats...Oh, sorry I misread "threats."
4. He teaches good ball handling techniques
3. He said he’s not a pedophile.
2. Penn State has a pretty good record—how bad could he be?
1. He’s a strong advocate of masculine hygiene.