Sunday, December 25, 2011

YO MAMA's are so PHAT




Yo mama’s so fat she has her mother’s chin and her grandmothers chin and her aunts chin and her great grandmothers chin and her great aunts chin…

Yo mama’s so fat they call her the Ener-sizer Bunny…she keeps growing, and growing, and GROWING…

Yo mama’s so fat when she sits on the bus she really sits ON the bus.

Yo mama’s so stupid she resents you because Mother’s Day is only once a year and son-day is every week.

Yo mama’s so fat when she breastfed you you almost drowned.

Yo mama’s so fat when she was old enough to date her mama said, “take the cow for free!”

Yo mama’s so fat there are parts of her ass that have yet to be discovered.

Yo mama’s so fat she fits a size 13 dress…on her finger.

Yo mama’s so fat she thought her nickname was Beese cuz people always see her and say “Oh beese…”

Yo mama’s so fat her ass has a cell phone so it can call her when it needs to go.

Yo mama’s so fat when she had surgery the doctors showed up in safari gear.

Yo mama’s so fat that when she was a child it took a village to raise her.

Yo mama’s so fat she eats with a forklift.

Yo mama’s so fat everything makes her ass look fat.

Yo mama’s so fat that when she took a plane they said: ”in the unlikely event of a water landing yo mama may be used as a floatation device.”

Yo mama’s so fat she survived in the wilderness because the bears felt stuffed just looking at her.

Yo mama’s so fat her snow cone had an avalanche.

Yo mama’s so fat she tried out for the part of Gilligan’s Island.

Yo mama’s so fat she parts her hair in the east.

Yo mama’s so fat she made Santa Claus look anorexic.

Yo mama’s so fat she tells yo daddy where she likes to be touched by longitude and latitude.

Yo mama’s so fat Santa said “Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Merry Christma-ASS!

Yo mama’s so fat when she had hot flashes they called it “global warming.”

Yo mama’s so stupid she thought Justin Bieber was a vaginal contraceptive.

Yo mama’s so fat that when she chased your daddy all through high school she really went through the high school.