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| Looks, talent, charisma...she's got none of them. |
9. The quality of singing in the world had begun to show signs of improving, threatening the status quo.
8. Her agent was hung by his ankles over her vagina.
7. To prepare the world for Nikki Minaj.
6. Ugly is the new pretty, tone deaf is the new talented, and laughable is the new admirable.
5. her producers pulled a bait and switch and caught a million stupid fish.
4. Michael Jacksons passing left a void in the confused-gender-entertainment market.
3. She won a "Chance to be a Star" contest on the back of a bag of Alpo.
2. By repeating the phonym "ga" she inadvertantly tapped into a secret power source. And because she swallows.
1. Because no other entertainer considered her a threat and therefor they allowed her to pursue her life's goal to bring bad entertainment to the world.
LITTLE KNOWN (or cared about) LADY GAGA FACTS:
The name Gaga was derived from the name she was given in high school: "Old Lady Gag" because of her badly weathered look and her relentless pursuit of mastering the deep throat technique which she has yet to achieve, at the cost of many school lunches and her chances of ever bagging any of her male classmates.
Lady Gaga almost landed a movie deal before the whole production of "The Elephant Man's Wife" was trashed upon realizing it was a really stupid idea.
Dogs won't nuzzle her crotch finding her scent too offensive.
By Numbsain...as low as his standards are he still agrees with the dogs.
