Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Yo Mama Jokes 2012

Yo mama so poor she tries to social network on an etch-a-sketch.

Yo mama's so stupid when she fills out "date of birth" she puts "it's complicated."

Yo mamas so poor a bum asked her for spare change so she robbed him.

Yo mama's so poor that you opened your lunchbox and saw she ate most of your sandwich…and stole your thermos.

Yo mama's so poor she she fights the dog for your table scraps.

Yo mama's so stupid she peed in the car pool.

Yo mama’s so poor she cuts the crust off your sandwich and uses it for the meat inside.

Yo mama’s so stupid she saw Macy’s was having a white sale and said, “I'll take two.”

Yo mama’s so poor, on Christmas eve she rewraps the same presents she stole for you last year and resells them to you.

Yo mama’s so stupid she saw a sign in the store, “All pants half off” so she pulled hers down to her knees.

Yo mama’s so stupid she tried to occupy walmart

Yo mama’s so stupid she saw a street sign, “Stop Ahead” so she got out to look for it.

Yo mama’s so fat she could occupy Wall Street.

Yo mama’s so stupid she spent the food money on beer so she could recycle the cans for cash.

Yo mama’s so poor she beat you up and stole your lunch money.

Yo mama’s so poor she only turns the refrigerator on when there’s food in it.

Yo mama’s so poor she goes to the supermarket just to browse.

Yo mama’s so stupid she traded her teeth for a box of granola.

Yo mama’s so unattractive she can’t even turn on a light.

Yo mama’s so ugly she can’t even attract flies.

Yo mama’s so poor she rents out your room while you're at school.

Yo mama’s so stupid she asked for Reader’s Chew and Reader’s Swallow before she would look at Reader’s Digest. We didn’t ask what she wanted to read after that.

Yo mama’s so stupid she took a can of mace to bed in case she had a bad dream.

Yo mama’s so stupid she wouldn’t bring Aunt Jemima or Uncle Ben into
the house cause it was too messy for relatives.

Yo mama’s so poor she wouldn’t let you date, talkin’ ’bout, “Why sell the cow when we gettin’ milk for free?”

Yo mama's so stupid she tilted back Jennifer Lo-Pez' head and tried to pull one out of her neck.

Back-Handed Yo Mama Jokes

Yo mama’s so beautiful she was approached by some photographers to be on the cover of the SPCA newsletter.

Yo mama's so smart she learned to rollover and beg in one day.

Yo mama's so great that when she laid out on the beach some conservationists tried to push her back out to sea.

Yo mama's so classy the when she goes to Europe she stays at the Paris Hilton.

Yo mama's such a good housekeeper that every time she divorces she keeps the house.

Yo mama's such a champion she won best heifer in show at the county fair.

Yo mama's so smart she won Student of the Month in Special Ed class.

That's all I have to say about yo mama this time but if you've heard or made up a good yo mama joke feel free to leave a comment and give my mama your best shot. C'mon, bring it on. Show me what you got! You got somethin' to say about my mama?...Yeah, I didn't think so...

For more sick & twisted yo mama jokes click on these links:

Some of these will get you in big trouble with people who have really stupid, fat, ugly mama's.